To answer the question........


...."how is mommy adjusting???" I am going to attempt to answer this question that everyone seems to keep asking me! I have so many emotions and feelings that it's hard to even answer!
First and Foremost, I am Blessed!!! I have so many wonderful people who have given so much to help make our transition smooth, to bless me and the children, to help with the difficult things and that have loved and continue to love us daily. I am overflowing with happiness at the blessings that the Lord has provided!
I seem to be keeping up with things. The house is clean, organized and functional, the kids are bathed and teeth brushed every day and fed 3+ times a day! :) I keep up with the laundry, I am keeping up with work and paperwork, the dishes are done daily and I have been checking out programs and schools for Ecrissa, going to deaf and hard of hearing meetings, clinics, doctors appointments, on the phone with various deaf and hard of hearing professionals and programs and insurance companies and doctors!!!!
But, I have two conflicting inner battles. One says, you are working to hard. I'm exhausted. To keep up with work, the house, two kids, their special needs, etc, etc, I am exhausted. I keep telling myself that I need to take more time to rest and chill with the kids. But, as soon as I do that, I have this other inner part of me screaming, "YOU SHOULD BE DOING SOMETHING!!!". I feel like I should do more sign language work with Ecrissa, read a book to them, do an art project, Do searches online for Ancheri Care, spend more time reading the Bible, call friends that I haven't caught up with yet, dust again, vacuum again, and the list goes on and on depending on the day!!!!!! I rarely feel that I've done enough, yet at the same time, I feel over worked! How does that work???? How can both of these feelings be so strong at the same time!!!!!! I don't know, I guess it's normal mommyhood and as a single mom, I am sure that I am always going to feel tired, yet that there are things left undone!
All in all, I am doing well! I am encouraged daily by something that the Lord puts in my path! I know that there are always going to be frustrations in this life. I am thankful for the blessings that outweigh the frustrations. It keeps me going and helps me to realize that I am not perfect. I am going to miss nights of bedtime stories, I am going to leave the kitchen a mess, I am going to forget to do something, but the bottom line is, as long as we are together as a family with Christ as our center, we will make it and lead happy and healthy lives!

Comments

Manda said…
Being a mom is the toughest job I've ever done! There is always more to be done and never enough time. You're doing great. Just don't forget to take some time for yourself once in a while!!
May 18, 2009 at 9:49 PM
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